May 26, 2010
We're dealing with a new merchant provider for a client, some group of assholes called Payfuse. In order to receive the API so I can actually make the site process credit cards, I've had to:
- Open an e-mail with a 20-megabyte HTML file attached (yes, you read that right... 20 MB of goddamn HTML) which hosed my e-mail client.
- Log into the server via webmail so I can download an attachment larger than most of the web sites I create.
- Choose my e-mail address from the list of recipients and get told I have to register to read the message.
- Register for an account at Cisco.com.
- Reload the 20 MB attachment that is thankfully saved to my desktop now, so I can re-select my e-mail address and enter my password.
- Download Java so I can read a goddamned e-mail.
- After Java installs, reload the 20 MB page yet again so I can actually read the oh-so-important message I've been sent.
- Discover my password is "incorrect". Same thing happened to the boss, so this means that something in this amazingly baroque process isn't working right.
We're talking about a credit-card processing API here, not the fucking nuclear football. In the time it's taken me to discover that this retardery wrapped in brain damage surrounded by a pain in my ass doesn't even work right, I could be halfway through their documentation, which I'll be surprised if it actually turns out to be useful.
So if you're looking to do credit card processing, deal with anybody else. These people suck at golf-ball-through-a-garden-hose levels and I doubt my opinion of them will improve when I actually get to write code.
